I am from India. Now living in the US. Just starting to record a few thoughts on the net. Let me know if you'd like to know anything from me.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

late night humor

"President Bush went to Iraq to boost the new government. That shows you
how rough the situation is in Iraq when a guy with 30% approval rating stops by
to give you a boost." --Jay Leno

"First Lady Laura Bush flew from Washington to New York and instead of flying Air Force One, she took the Delta Shuttle. The first lady said she did this because unlike Air Force One, commercial airlines are cheaper, they waste less gas, and she doesn't get stuck sitting next to a dumb guy." --Conan O'Brien

"Last night was the season finale of 'West Wing.' 'West Wing' is gone. And ABC has cancelled 'Commander In Chief.' So, now the only fictional president is Bush." --David Letterman

"President Bush said catching a 7.5 pound fish was his best moment since becoming president. You know the sad thing, a lot of historians would agree with that." --Jay Leno

"President Bush said that when it comes to hurricane preparedness, step number one is to, quote, 'pray that there's no hurricanes.' Later President Bush admitted, 'Yeah, that's our entire plan.'" --Conan O'Brien

"President Bush is denying that he's planning an air strike on Iran. So, you know what that means? He's planning an air strike on Iran." --David Letterman

"June 1st is the start of the hurricane season. President Bush is already stockpiling excuses." --David Letterman

"Saturday is April Fool's Day and President Bush ... has a great April Fool's joke planned. He's going to put out that old 'Mission Accomplished' banner." --David Letterman

"The president said we must continue to find new sources of oil. The only place he doesn't want any drilling, 'Brokeback Mountain.'" --Jay Leno

"The government is scheduled to launch a mission to Pluto. Apparently this is President Bush's last chance to find those weapons of mass destruction." --Jay Leno